12.10. Upbringing Goals for Children (and Adults)

Love of God

( Deut. 6:5-9 ) The first goal of raising children is to cultivate the love of God in them, in the following three areas:
(a) Salvation ( 1 John 2:15 );
(b) Heart devoted to God ( Matt. 22:37 );
(c) Mind of God - His thoughts and desires ( Phil. 2:5 ).

Love of Neighbor

There are three areas that children have to learn in order to relate to others:
(a) Treat them as yourself ( Matt. 22:38-39 );
(b) Being an ambassador for Christ ( Gal. 6:1-2 );
(c) Use talents to be of service to others ( Rom. 15:2 ).

Character

( Matt. 16:24-25 ) Equip children with these character traits:
... Be rid of selfishness ( Eph. 4:22 );
... Be contented ( Phil. 2:14 );
... Be upright ( 1 Tim. 4:16 );
... Be disciplined ( 2 Tim. 1:7 );
... Redeem the time ( Eph. 5:16 ).

Principles of Decision-Making

( 2 Tim. 3:16-17 ; Deut. 6:1-9 ) Children are to be taught the Law. The Law is to be remembered, and not to be forgotten, in order for them to pass God's truth on to others. God's truth is to be taught at home; we are not to rely on school, church, etc.

The primary responsibility of parents is to secure the child's welfare and the child's soul on the basis of eternal values and the teaching of Scriptures.

( Matt. 6:33 ) The child's career or popularity in the world are secondary factors. As the child learns to depend on God, to learn God's ways, His thoughts, His principles, to learn to honor, to please and to glorify God, then His heavenly Father will take care of the child's needs on this earth. As the child depends on God in everything, God will take care of everything else.

All of the above is the long-range plan; reduce it to the level of the child, which is the short-range goal. Code of conduct is essential; that is, a system of rewards and punishment are necessary in order to control behavior. The goal of the parent is to teach the child to gradually be independent of the parent in order to be completely dependent upon God.

Priorities For a Married Woman

( Ps. 128:3 ; John 15:5-8 ; Gal. 5:22-23 )
Her relationship with God;
Her ministry to her family;
Her development of a godly character;
Her expression of godly conduct toward other people in and out of the home.

Priorities For a Married Man

The Established Heart

( Rom. 8:31 ) If God is with me, no one can successfully be my enemy. ( 1 Cor. 3:3 ) The human standard is the sense-ruled mind which engenders fear, sickness, poverty, and weakness. ( James 1:5-8 ) A mind dominated by God's thoughts, nature and ways is a Word-ruled mind that is never prepared to fail.

( 1 Cor. 2:16 ) We have the mind of Christ; therefore, we have the thoughts and purposes of His heart. We are either ruled by impulses or God's Word. Being ruled by God's Word, no matter what happens, we can stand unruffled and unaffected. And as we do this, we bring glory to the Father; we bring joy to Jesus; and we bring victory to our own hearts.

AMEN! ( Gen. 1:26 )

Work Out Your Salvation (Phil. 2:12-13)

Copyright © 2002 Adam Pulaski, Steve Lihn. All rights reserved.